Three- and 4-year-olds are often fascinated with and more than happy to reveal their private parts. Here's why. On a recent evening, my cousin's 4-year-old son ran into the closet after his bath. Suddenly, he threw open the door and proudly exclaimed to his mother and twin sister, "Look at my penis! Many 3- and 4-year-olds are oblivious to the notion that their private parts should be, well, private. Preschoolers often develop a fascination with their genitals and -- as with everything else they're learning about -- are eager to share their discoveries with others.
Although you may not be sure how to react when your son repeatedly sticks his hands in his pants or your daughter plays doctor with a friend, keep in mind that such curiosity is perfectly normal for kids this age. Children are sensual from birth. Since they're continually cuddled, rocked, fed, and bathed, their lives revolve around their bodily sensations.
By preschool age, kids express their sensuality more overtly, doing all sorts of things that make their bodies feel good -- whether it's running as fast as they can, splashing in water, or finger-painting. And since many 3- and 4-year-olds have recently graduated from diapers -- gaining greater access to their private parts -- they've discovered that touching their genitals is particularly pleasurable and soothing.
Some children touch themselves frequently and may do it unconsciously at bedtime or when playing quietly; other kids masturbate only rarely.
At this age, your child is also starting to grasp the concept of gender identity -- that boys and girls have something different in their underpants. He or she can work with you to distinguish age-appropriate and normal sexual behaviors from behaviors that are developmentally inappropriate or signal potential abuse.
Asking for help simply means you want what is best for your child, and you will do whatever you can to help him or her succeed. Gender Identity Development in Children. Child Abuse and Neglect. You may be trying to access this site from a secured browser on the server. Please enable scripts and reload this page. Turn on more accessible mode. Turn off more accessible mode. Skip Ribbon Commands.
Skip to main content. Turn off Animations. Turn on Animations. Our Sponsors Log in Register. Log in Register. Ages and Stages. Healthy Living. Safety and Prevention. Family Life. Health Issues. Tips and Tools. Children as young as 1 to 2 years old will begin touching their genitals during diaper changes and little boys may at times get erections. At this age it is also very common for your toddler to insist on being naked.
As your child grows and begins to speak she may become curious about the differences between males and females. It is not uncommon for a child to ask questions about her private parts or the private parts of other people she knows. However, approaching the subject calmly and with a willingness to answer any questions will help your child develop and maintain a healthy understanding of his or her body. Create a personalised content profile.
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Sexuality is a normal part of life, even for young children. Like other aspects of development like motor skills or emotional intelligence, sexual behavior tends to follow a typical trajectory in childhood. Most kids discover their penis or vulva at a similar stage of early development. They might "play with their privates" incidentally as a part of self-discovery or because it feels good.
Sometimes, a child might show an interest in looking at other people's genitals, too. This behavior often begins around age 2 and tends to decrease in both boys and girls after age 5. Though a young child's interest in their own or another person's genitals is a normal part of sexual development, it might be concerning or feel awkward for some family members or friends. In a public setting, a child's sexual behavior, however innocent, can create embarrassing moments for a childcare provider, a parent, or even other children.
For the most part, this behavior is nothing to worry about and is part of healthy sexual development. However, certain behaviors can also be a red flag of stress or possible abuse. Here are guidelines on what's normal and what to expect when it comes to early sexual development. Additionally, find tips for helping children understand what is appropriate touching and what's not. Young children commonly engage in a variety of normal behaviors involving exploring their own or their peers' private parts.
Babies will often touch their own penis or vulva during diaper changes as a way of discovering their own body parts, just as they would grab their toes or faces. By around preschool age, children might start to show more curiosity specifically about private parts, what makes them different than other parts of our bodies, and how boys' and girls' bodies differ.
From ages 2 to 6, the following are all common early sexual behaviors.
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